Happy New Year and all that ...

Well another year has been and gone and I still don't update this thing half as much as I should! A writer? Pah! as some would say (especially Beth!) I haven't even got a Pen...

For my end / start of year blog I guess I should do some kind of review of the year and try to prove (yet again) that mankind really is just a virus with shoes - thanks Bill, still thinking of you in 2009!

I have been reminded this year on so many occasions, of the scene in Monty Python's Meaning of Life around the middle of the film where the scene moves to the boardroom of a multi national company. The scene pans out something like this -

"CHAIRMAN: ...Which brings us once again to the urgent realisation of just how much there is still left to own. Item six on the agenda: the meaning of life. Now, uh, Harry, you've had some thoughts on this.
HARRY: That's right. Yeah, I've had a team working on this over the past few weeks, and, uh, what we've come up with can be reduced to two fundamental concepts. One: people are not wearing enough hats. Two: matter is energy. In the universe, there are many energy fields which we cannot normally perceive. Some energies have a spiritual source which act upon a person's soul. However, this soul does not exist ab initio, as orthodox Christianity teaches. It has to be brought into existence by a process of guided self-observation. However, this is rarely achieved, owing to man's unique ability to be distracted from spiritual matters by everyday trivia.
[pause]
BERT: What was that about hats, again?"

I think I would have to say that this is undoubtedly my favourite scene in any film, and somewhat sums up mankind in the 21st century. Totally fuelled by media of all types, we are constantly being , you know, being, well, kind of , err, yeah distracted by rubbish... (what was that google search again...cup, girls, two...)

See what I mean?

In no particular order, my fave / worst distractions of the year...

The Brand / Ross debacle... two guys, being idiots to someone who didn't really care - becomes a national outrage - get over it - it really didn't matter.

John Sergeant on Strictly come dine with me in the jungle (or whatever). An old man dancing badly. it's not big, it's clever and it really isn't funny. It must have been hiding something really important in the news that day/week...

The American election going on forever... okay, I guess this might be quite important to the world all in, but does it really have to take so long?

As to some of my dumbest stories of the year, how about -

Linda Lusardi calling 999 for help as she was late for the panto she was in (On no she wasn't etc. etc_) - this story is only topped by an old vegitarian friend of mine going into a freezer shop, and asking for some of that "linda Lusardi stuff".

The fake Penis sellers being jailed...

"The makers of a prosthetic penis to help men cheat on drugs tests have pleaded guilty to two charges of conspiracy in a US federal court. "

The chap who filmed himself breaking the law... and then posted the films on youtube. With his contact details.

To round up, I guess my message to all is to google "Dumb" to just prove why global warming isn't a problem, and the sooner mankind is wiped out the better! (In fact the best search I came across was "Deaf Drummer" - don't ask me why I was searching that...)

Apart from that - Have a good new year one and all - and I'll be back to moan soon enough!